The Memories that Keep us Coming Back – Pastor Thoughts

Sometime in June, I was invited into a “secret” Facebook group made up of people I knew from high school. The group was organized for planning a surprise retirement party for my high school band teacher. At first I was shocked to see that my band teacher wasn’t long retired already. I quickly reverse engineered the math, looking at some photos posted in the group and I realized that when I was in high school band between 1998 and 2001, my band teacher was about the age I am now…. He seemed older in my mind in high school… because surely 16 year olds wouldn’t think I am old now, right? Right!?!?

Anyway, my beloved band teacher was a lot like Mr. Holland from Mr. Hollands Opus, the 1995 movie staring Richard Dreyfus. He even looked like Richard Dreyfus in the movie, with wire-rimmed glasses, a mustache and the same haircut. He loved making music, and in his 40 years of teaching band he inspired a  A LOT of students to keep pursuing music. Even my sister became a band teacher!

Some of my most formative memories were from band. I was in the symphonic band, a class that had double the usual class periods. This meant I spent a class period every day playing music (and one day twice!). My band teacher expected excellence, but also taught us how to make beautiful music together. He also took us all over the world. We travelled to Red Deer, AB, Whistler,BC, Anaheim and Disneyland, Germany and Italy. These trips are some of my most cherished memories from high school. 

His retirement party was going to be similar to that in the Mr. Holland movie. In other words, former students would come back so that my band teacher could conduct a band with all kinds of students playing much of the music he used with his high school bands. 

I saw some videos of the event and it looked pretty special. The music room had moved from where I remember it to the old automotive wing, but my band teacher looked the same as ever (except for the grey hair). 

But I also had a weird feeling watching the videos. It was a combination of sadness and longing, maybe some nostalgia. I realized that this time in my life, these amazing memories of making music with friends and classmates was never going to happen again. At least not the way it used to be. 

I already had a taste of that feeling following high school when I joined a community band. I loved that band, too; but it wasn’t quite the same. The people were different and we practiced only a couple hours one night a week. We played some of the same music, but we didn’t play in the same way.

I have been thinking a fair bit about these kinds of experiences this summer. Maybe it is because I am 40, or going back to seminary this fall (and the seminary buildings have moved, too!). Maybe it’s seeing my children growing up, especially as we have moved houses and they have changed schools. 

I think it is also part of the reality of serving in ministry. As a pastor I get to be a part of significant and memorable moments in people’s lives. Baptisms, confirmations, weddings, funerals. It is not uncommon (especially in summer vacation season) for people to come around with their own strong memories of these important life events. In these situations I am on the other side of those memories, the new and unfamiliar person who can only (kind-ofsort-of) offer a version of the Church that isn’t quite the same as it used to be. I have heard lots of stories of past weddings and funerals, stories of my pastoral predecessors, stories of youth events and young adults doing silly things or finding love, stories of former Sunday School teachers and organists and youth leaders. 

My usual response has been to point to what the Church is now, what it has become. And it is true, even as the people change, as the activities and programs adapt, the mission of proclaiming the Gospel remains. But that doesn’t make the longing and sadness easier. 

So, having been reminded of that feeling, I know I will be more sensitive and empathetic to the stories of what the Church used to be. I suspect that this is something that all of us will have to do from time to time. But also it’s important  to remember that the ways in which we are living as a community, the music we are making (so to speak and literally), the youth trips to CLAY, the baptisms, confirmations, weddings and funerals happening now, will be significant life-long memories for folks down the road.

Hopefully, these memories will not only remind us of God’s enduring presence and love in our lives, but also will keep us connected and returning to this community that doesn’t end after confirmation, high school or youth group or getting married or when a loved one dies. May this community be one of the few places in our world that continues to be a place where memories are made, yet where we can keep coming back to our whole lives. 

The Summers of Yesteryear – Pastor Thoughts

When I was a kid, I remember summer holidays feeling like endless weeks of unstructured time, full of possibilities. There were the chances to play with friends in the neighbourhood, invent games to play or adventures to undertake. Along the way the weeks were sprinkled with family vacations and trips to see out-of-province relatives, weeks at various Bible camps in Alberta or local sports, music or city recreation camps. I even remember going to Vacation Bible School at my home congregation many years. 

Summers were a strange and wonderful time where we got to be free, to try new things, and to make new community – even if only for a while. 

There was of course a lot of boredom and aimlessness too, I am sure our parents found us insufferable at times. 

As an adult, it seems that summertimes have morphed into different experiences. I am sure many of us still try to find that unstructured freedom with vacation time, but the chores and responsibilities of life don’t take a break. Family vacations can feel like as much work as time off.

Summers the past few years have been even stranger than ever, with pandemic limits on the community gatherings that we Canadians save up all winter long to over-indulge in through the warm summer months. 

After the busiest school/program/work year of the 20s (are we allowed to call this decade the 20s?), I have been relishing the chance to find some balance and calm this summer. Even with Barbie and Oppenheimer movies, global heatwaves, wildfire smoke, the Prime Minister’s marriage ending, traffic tragedies in Manitoba (at the same Carberry intersection!), along with the usual war in Ukraine, the confounding economy and the ever dramatic US political soap opera all still newsworthy… Even with all of that, summer has been somewhat of a break from the usual burdens of a busy life. 

While there has been some rest to be found during this time, the reality check of Summer 2023 is that it is unlikely that the those summers of my childhood are going to be making a comeback. Our world has been changing for a long time, but the last few years have shown us that there is no return to the way it was. Navigating the challenges of being a community, being a society is only going to get harder. 

The Church has not been immune to change either. The communities that we once were are unlikely to return, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t important work for us to be doing. In many ways, there is even more need for the Gospel message now. Congregations offer a different vision of what it means to live in this world, to be in relationship with our neighbour. We tell the story of a God who declares us to be beloved children and brings us into the One Body of Christ as a community. Church communities stand as a direct challenge to a 21st Century way of life that tells us we are only the sum of our productivity and achievements. Trusting ourselves to God’s care contrasts the failing capacity of modern society to keep juggling all the balls of a complicated and rapidly changing world. 

I suspect that the rest and renewal to be found in 2023 is one rooted this good news of Jesus. Here in this odd community of believers called the church, there is refreshment to be found as keep telling the Good News story that doesn’t mesh with what the rest of world is telling us the other days of the week.

With lots of summer weeks still ahead, I hope that church and the story of God’s love can be for you a place to find rest this year.

Starting New Things This Fall – Pastor Thoughts

My children keep asking me how much longer Spring Break will be. They haven’t really distinguished yet between Spring Break and Summer Break.

They are true COVID children in that their experience of their first few years of school has been marked by several extended breaks or pauses of in classroom learning. So Summer Break has yet to take concrete shape in their minds. And different than my childhood longing that summer breaks would last forever, they are looking forward to seeing their friends and teachers again. They have lived through the experience of not knowing when they might suddenly without warning not be returning to school for a week or month or even longer. 

So we have been preparing them for how long summer break is and when school will start again, going over the schedule of family trips, days camps, visits from friends and family, and so on. 

As the kids look forward to going back to school already, I find myself in the same boat. I announced a few weeks ago that I am going back to school this fall too, to begin a Doctor of Ministry (DMin) degree program at the seminary in Saskatoon. Since graduating in 2009, I will admit that I have enjoyed being free from the unique pressures of going to school, as I went straight from grade school to university to seminary. In fact, I still have the occasional bad dream where I haven’t prepared for an exam or written a paper that is due. 

But the seminary that I am going back to is quite different than the one I graduated from in 2009. My four years of seminary, like my four years of undergraduate study, were fairly traditional. In person, on-campus learning in a semestered format. 

Now, the seminary has shifted to an intensive and often online format. Courses are taken one at a time in the span of two to three weeks, one after another, rather than three to five courses at a time over a three-month semester. Courses are also offered either in person or over Zoom, which the seminary started long before the pandemic. This was done to accommodate students who couldn’t uproot families or cease working, but who could be in Saskatoon for a week or two and could study at home. 

In addition to the changed intensive, online option format, the Doctor of Ministry Degree program will also be a new kind of study experience for me. The DMin program is similar to a PhD program in that it is a terminal degree meant to help students delve deeply into un-researched topic areas. But it is different than a PhD, which is a purely academic degree intended to focus on theoretical research; the DMin has a professional component. It might be a compared to a specialization in Medicine or in Law. A DMin is intended to be done while a student is working, and research is meant to be conducted in the context that the student is serving in. So it is not just that you *can* work full time while doing a DMin program, you *must* be working full time in ministry.

Because the DMin is done in short intensive spurts along side the regular rhythms and duties of ministry, this summer I have already begun readings and coursework. I used to get truly annoyed by the mature students in university or seminary who were always reading and working ahead, and here I am doing the same! And at this stage of my life, I now get why those olderstudents were like that. It is the same reason why sleeping in these days means getting up at 7 am, rather than 6:00. 

Thankfully, there is still more than a month until school starts and almost two months until I head off to Saskatoon for my first week of DMin work. Yet, this year, like my kids, I am looking forward to school starting in the fall and the new journey that it will bring⎯but not too far forward! 

Discipleship through the Seasons of Life – Pastor Thoughts

As many of you know, we moved into our new home last November. 

Since then, we have been settling into the interior of the home. Throughout the winter we were attending to building some shelves, patching up a few places, and lots of other general maintenance. We moved in the day after the first permanent snowfall of winter. Once the snow started piling up on the back deck and in the back yard, the outdoor spaces became largely unusable. 

The most significant yard upkeep that I learned after 10 years of renting was a bit of good and timely snow clearing. Our shared driveway with our neighbour meant that clearing our snow was a courtesy to her (and a good life choice!). 

Now, I will confess my spring/summer/fall yard upkeep habits were not as stellar.

The few flower beds around the house often got overrun with weeds and the spider plant(?) bushes got out of control. There were certainly rabbits living in one of the flowers beds for several years. The fall leaves only got fully raked up some years. 

But the one thing I kind of tried to keep up with was mowing the lawn – which I suppose is required by city bylaw. The lawn mower provided by the landlords was an old smelly two-stroke with the wheels almost coming off and handle bars that flopped all over. After almost losing a toe one-too-many times, I bought a battery operated mower to be an environmentally responsible adult (and to have a virtually maintenance-free tool). 

Still, I did everything wrong in terms of lawn care and the lawn was in really rough shape by the end of our time in that house. 

There is something about being a homeowner rather than a legally-obligated renter that quickly changes one’s attitude towards yard maintenance. This spring, I have spent more time and money on yard upkeep than ever previously. I have watched Youtube videos and read gardening advice online. I have talked to my neighbour about how to keep up our shared lawn space. I have been to Canadian Tire so many times that one of the cashiers told me that I should get a rewards card if I was going to be there every day. I may have been a little snarky when I said I wouldn’t keep coming there every day forever. 

Apparently, lawns need more than just occasional mowing to be healthy. I also learned that hand tools for detaching and aerating add up to quite the workout! Our garage shelves now have things like grass over-seed, fertilizer, weed killer, a weed-pulling tool, a trimmer/edger, leaf blower, different kinds of rakes and, of course, the hose and sprinkler are getting lots of use these days. Also, who knew that mowing once every two to three weeks is bad for your lawn? 

Okay… so what am I getting at here with this long description of tedious yard work? Well, I think there is some kind of metaphor here. 

In different times or seasons of life, our ability to invest time and energy into the various parts of our lives changes. It could be lawn care, but it also just as likely could be things like work, family relationships (marriage and parenting), community involvement, hobbies, and church and faith. 

Sometimes it is all we can muster to just do enough not to get fired at work. To volunteer to bring a couple of bags of Doritos to the family potluck. To write a cheque for the kids’ or grandkids’ school fundraiser. To drag ourselves out of bed on Sunday to make it to church half a dozen times a year. 

And at other times, we have energy to invest: In important projects or growing our skills at work. We are the family members with a home, time and energy for hosting family and friends on a regular basis. There is a passion within us to serve in the community with service clubs or time to get into a hobby that brings us joy. We are able to serve at church on council or read the lessons or help with confirmation or mow the church lawn (in addition to our own!), and so on. 

We all move in and out of seasons of life when we are able to do more or to do less. And when we want to have a healthy well-manicured lawn and yard, or when we want to grow a rich and vibrant faith, it takes time and energy to invest in the tools and resources that we need – connecting with a community of others doing the same, as well as with teachers or guides who can help us along the way. 

And if our lawn looks great but our neighbour’s is half dead and full of weeds (one can substitute similar situations in other areas of life), begrudging them their lack of capacity doesn’t help. Rather, we need to extend our neighbours grace and time to survive their seasons of low capacity, knowing that we ourselves have almost certainly been there at times or will be in the future. 

Our most powerful witness is when we are able to do more. A well manicured and vibrant faith practice shows more clearly the transforming work of the Holy Spirit. 

Discipleship, in all its forms, doesn’t usually happen in a straight line. Yet, in whatever space we find ourselves, Jesus is walking with us and calls us to walk with each other – in both the high and low times, whether the grass is green or brown. 

Transforming into Summer Disciples – Pastor Thoughts

The world seems to be shifting into summer mode all around us.

The program year is coming to an end and it feels like everyone is packing in so many of the things that we have had to pair down or cancel during the last few years. Our family has been to dance recitals, piano recitals, school concerts and school neighbourhood BBQs, and soooo many birthday parties. 

In the church, we are moving into the long season of green where we slow down to hear the stories of Christ’s teaching, ministry and miracles. This summer we are hearing from Matthew’s Gospel, which began last week as Jesus called his disciples to follow him. This week we hear how he sends out his disciples with the authority to preach, heal, teach and cast out demons in his name. 

As we settle into the pacing of Ordinary Time, I cannot help but contemplate the transitions occurring at this time of year. There is all the “usual stuff” such as extra-curricular activities ending and summer vacations starting; children finishing one grade and preparing for the next; committees, ministries and programs taking summer hiatus; even hockey entering into the offseason. My mind is on colleagues and congregations entering into transition as well. Similarly, there was an the ordination on Sunday, marking formal beginning of a new ministry. 

I am also thinking about my own smaller shift into further education in the Doctor of Ministry program this fall and how that will transform the ministry that we are doing together. 

The world feels as though it is moving again in ways that it hasn’t moved for years now. Certainly things were happening, but the stuff of life was largely on pause as we waited to get through some very difficult circumstances. 2023 has been a year to catch up on things that we have been waiting for since 2019. 

And yet, the world is different. We aren’t going back; we are all that much older, and still recovering. 

Transition is hard; it is hard because it forces us to see and acknowledge the change we see around us, the changes we feel within us.  

Somewhere in all of this moving to the next new thing, I wonder how much we will try to go backwards and how much we can move forwards. I think God has something to say about that, too. Transition⎯moving into the next thing is what God is calling us into. But that doesn’t mean it is easy or that being changed is something that happens on our terms. 

As we move into summer 2023, we do so in a world that is going to new places. Yet, even as we face new experiences and realities that are stretching and transforming us, we know that God is with us and guiding our way.

An iPhone Pastor for a Typewriter Church